Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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