Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
