FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
