i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
