so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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