For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
