My room smells like vodka and shame
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
