these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
