At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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