In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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