to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
