What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Yo dont text me then not text me
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
