I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
