what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
