Sry I called you an 8
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
