Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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