Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
My liver just had a heart attack.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
