not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
