i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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