So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
