are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
