i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
