Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize