what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize