The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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