god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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