I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
