YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
