goodnight i made you a song goodbye
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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