i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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