I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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