so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize