just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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