She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
