It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Randomize