I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Randomize
