if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
