You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
