everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize