I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
