at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
