You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize