I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
