Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
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