he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize