Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
It's official drugs can't kill me
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
