We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
he quoted the bible to break up with me
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Randomize
