come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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