Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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