Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
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