I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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