I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
